The unpredictable, unreliable opinion of Isaac

Standing on my pedestal amidst the pounding waters I gaze, north-west, into the never ending layers of color, cloud, sun, stars, trees, and water. Pillars of rain beneath shining clouds smudge wide vertical drapes. The rain blends one section of sky into another as though a painter brushed his thumb down across an unfinished pastel picture. I would fly into the heights of it, and swim in its raw perfection. Spray from the waves hits me; wind carries me; everything kisses me. I see the fullness of satisfaction in the fullness of the sunset. The world no longer hurts, and the entire universe is explained. I am satisfied, and all is good. I experience this moment forever, I realize infinity, eternity, death, and life.
My body remains north, and my head turns from north-west to north-east. Suddenly the wind that was blowing across my face crashes directly into my left ear, like rage and thunder. Overcome by the passionate, angry roar I stare directly into perfect anti-thesis of all that I just experienced. Waves lash out at the sky and the sky smites them, bends them, and blows them to pieces. Monstrous storm clouds pour they're fury on the sea below stirring all consuming swells and whitecaps. All pain is there, and within me. I am lashed by water and red stripes of dying sun bleed across the horizon. I am there, and I am the storm, I am the anger.
By animal impulse I cut my head west. The sounds ceases, and the wind turns from torment to refreshing.
Soft rain and sweet songs. Pelican soars, and heavens rejoice.
My head turns back.
Noise, chaos, everything dark.
Back and forth I turn my head. Each time my head turns the deafening roar switches off and on like night and day.
I face north, and stop gazing. I stop facing and start feeling. I become one with both universes. Both universes become no universe. Nothing is everything, I am nothing.
I come back to my pedastal with a jolt. Duty calls and I return to my work. I still contain the everything.

Leaning back in my chair, eyes closed, I absorb the glorious sunshine. My hands continue to massage sunscreen into my skin, to no avail. My sweat carries the creamy white oil to the surface undaunted. I am content.
The sun continues to rain on me the sweet rays of God's approval as I leisurely sip away at my lemonade, leaving my oily white prints upon the stenciled images of palm trees.
The large deck surrounding the pool is quite comfortably sparse. There are only a few others, like me, drinking lemonade from matching glasses. The pool, however, contains countless millions. They wallow and struggle for a piece of air, much less food or drink.
They call to me, pleading for help, for provisions, and for love. I am deeply and sincerely moved.
I stand and, feeling such perfect and selfless love, I applaud them. I sit again to write them a song - praising them for they're strength, beauty, and infinite worth.
As I sing for them, the scream and claw at the air, dying by the thousands.
Moved again by they're determination, I shout encouragement to them. I even call one of my neighbors attention to they're situation, showing him how urgently those people need relief.
They hear none of it over they're screams.

Having done all that I can I recline again, rejoicing in my good fortune. Blissfully I absorb the sweet, warm rays of God's approval.

I reached out to the twittering bird with my fingers
She touched my nail with her beak - even a little peck at my flesh
Lightly perched on a twig, still chirping, she spoke english words to me

I was awestruck, and responded "Who are you"

Each of the dark grey feathers that covered her wings and back was intricately lined with brighter shades of metallic silver
Her light grey breast was lined with a rich black
Bright colored eyes looked at me from within the ruby-red feathers that graced her head

"Yuppie" she answered
First I thought it was a strange name for such a graceful bird

"Yuppie of Heaven" she added

Realizing what she was, I blurted "I've NEVER talked to an angel"

"This is my first time" She shyly stated "Visiting a human, I mean"

Trying to joke I said "I guess that would make me a virgin of the divine"

As she kindly responded I awoke - in my tent - once again to the sound of birds
I waited in anticipation hoping she would appear to me in the real world
Suddenly a bird began an unmistakably angelic song above my tent

I opened my mouth and shouted "Yuppie!" - but I didn't hear my own words
I was cut off by the morning church bells

So close to a message from above - but cut off by time - by those glorious church bells
So much irony it almost pleases me

I woke up to sound of hourly church bells
Finally a dry sunny day
I could hear the birds flying in trees around me
Geese were playing and fighting in the giant lake, next to my home

By the time I got out of my tent it was church bells again
I packed my beautiful new tent and hid all my possessions under leaves by a tree

Pushups, stretch, eat, churchbells
Just me and my water bottles ran a few miles to a fast food joint, for water
When I returned my bags were lovingly waiting for me
I was proud to show how I had gotten water

I could hear the churchbells as I laid nude beneath the sun, by my very own lake
I excercised, did chinups in trees, still naked, and to the sound of church bells again

I put on my flip flops, and clothes and headed towards the road, cutting my bare toes on thorns

I couldn't hear the church bells as I walked down the train tracks
I could see the never ending lines, the trees, and the tall tan grass
I could smell the flowers I carried in my hand
They were red and white- I took from a garbage can, at a graveyard
I could feel the tears hit the cuts on my toes - the tears were caused by the flowers
I could hear my water bottle hitting the buckle on my pack
The church bells were far - and time no longer exist

I came across a pile of dry, scattered, ivory bones
I couldn't tell what creature had been hit by the train, but it was beautiful
probably an angel
I left a small red rose - just in case

Eventually I came to a road, I turned towards town
A beautiful girl with her boyfriend stopped at a stoplight beside me
She was wondering where I was bringing those flowers - she tried in vain to hide her smile
I pertended to hide my smile, as I gave her a small wink
She hid her reaction from the boy on her left

I came across a house with a sprinkler, just barely spurting water
I removed my pack and sandals, sneaking out back to turn up the water
Very refreshing shower - but I got caught

When I came across a dead robin on the white sidewalk, I removed the one last rose
from my hand-full of flowers
A little lady with white hair giggled at my gesture

All this to say, I've reached the library- my inbox full of messages
Each email hurting me from a different angle
I have no flowers - I left them outside
I have no church bells - the time of day is coldly written at the bottem of my screen

God, I hope somebody gives me a rose

I just thought I would update you folks on my status, since I left Canada. I feel like God elude's me, more like a ghost than anything. Wearing my backpack I feel out of place, but it seems almost like everybody purposefully will not acknowledge my presence; this adds to my feeling of isolation. I'm in the city of Dover, delaware. Iv'e stopped in about 8 or 9 towns so far, and this seems the most welcoming. It has more trees than the other towns. Honestly, it's sickening how little nature I have seen traveling here. It's almost as though all of america has become cold, and industrial. As I look at all the pipelines, factories, bulldozers, billboards, sports-cars, transport trucks, and pavement, I feel like I will never have a place, or role to play in such a sick society. It makes me feel like I don't even have a role to play on earth, like there's no way I can offset the meaningless destruction we are doing to ourselves.
It's funny how sobered I feel, I'm sure I have heard 30 kids cry while they're parents ignore them or scream at them. Iv'e been openly lied to a dozen times (mostly in New York). I havn't had a meaningful conversation with anybody, though one or two people have been kind to me.
I certainly wasn't planning on keeping people updated on the small events that happen to me, but I guess I wasn't planning not to either. I may or may not continue to post, or have the opportunity to do so for that matter. I have a 30 day library card in this little town, and I may be around long enough to see what this town has to offer me, and maybee what I have to offer it.
Everytime Iv'e had an adventure, in my life, it always starts out hard. But things always seem to get better. I sure hope so, cause I feel lost.
I look forward to growing in personal strength, peace, and self confidence.

with tears
Isaac

When my rod hits your skin you sing to me
A song that has no notes but muffled screams
And all my limbs touch all your limbs at once
I sweat with you, I sweat and your skin gleams

I've wrapped you up in cloth, and with my hands
I've placed pillows beneath your smooth white head
I have no shame with you without my pants
I look at you with love from in my bed

I'll pound you with such force and lightning speed
I'll bang you with such grace my childhood sweet
Through, with closed doors in dark we do our deeds
The sounds we make will echo in the streets

I'd not trade you for ass or lips or tit
No lover could compare to my drum kit

I know romance is not yet dead but sleeps
Like dragon slumbers 'neath the city's heart
Though we'd embalm true love like conquered beast
or cast away like leper to the dark

Why can't we live in fantasies and dreams?
Where lovers run barefoot and play guitars
To live amongst the rivers and the trees
To make a fire and love beneath the stars

I would prefer, I think, to live outside
What harm could one man do by living free?
With only one wall - on the windward side
and life a small step from eternity

I hope romance is not yet dead, but sleeps